They don’t tell you about the darkness.
When you read about startups, it’s all about the rocket ship growth, the nine-figure exits, the visionary founders who seem to have it all figured out. I know that world. I’ve been fortunate enough to have two successful exits, RemoteTeam and MovieLaLa. I’ve invested in over 200 companies, including some of the biggest names in AI like Anthropic and OpenAI. From the outside, it looks like a dream run.
But the headlines don’t tell you about the nights you can’t sleep, staring at the ceiling, wondering if you’re going to make payroll. They don’t talk about the crushing loneliness of being the one person who has to have all the answers, even when you’re riddled with self-doubt. They don’t mention the constant, grinding pressure that can wear you down to a nub.
I’m here to talk about the part of the founder journey that’s often shrouded in silence: the mental health struggle. It’s real, it’s brutal, and it’s something we need to be more open about.
The Myth of the Invincible Founder
We’ve all seen the archetype: the founder who works 20-hour days, sleeps under their desk, and seems to thrive on pure adrenaline and caffeine. We celebrate this hustle culture, but we rarely acknowledge the toll it takes. The truth is, we’re not machines. We’re human beings, with all the messy, complicated emotions that come with it.
I remember when I was building MovieLaLa. We were a consumer-facing app in a hyper-competitive space. The pressure to grow, to innovate, to beat the competition was immense. There were days when I felt like I was carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders. I was surrounded by a great team, but at the end of the day, the ultimate responsibility rested on me. That’s a heavy burden to bear.
It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking you have to be invincible. You’re the leader, the visionary. You can’t show weakness. But that’s a dangerous path to go down. It leads to burnout, anxiety, and depression. I’ve seen it happen to too many talented founders.
My Battle with the Darkness
I’ve had my own share of struggles. There have been times when I’ve felt completely overwhelmed, on the verge of giving up. The stress of running a company, the constant pressure to perform, the fear of failure – it can all be too much at times.
One of the lowest points for me was after we sold MovieLaLa to Gfycat. From the outside, it was a huge success. But on the inside, I felt lost. I had poured my heart and soul into that company for years, and suddenly, it was gone. I had lost my identity. I was no longer “Sahin, the founder of MovieLaLa.” I was just… Sahin. And I didn’t know who that was anymore.
That’s when the depression hit. It was a slow, creeping darkness that enveloped me. I lost interest in things I used to enjoy. I felt a profound sense of emptiness. It was a scary and isolating experience. I felt like I was the only one going through this, that no one would understand.
Finding My Way Back to the Light
Fortunately, I was able to find my way back. It wasn’t easy, and it didn’t happen overnight. But I learned some valuable lessons along the way that I want to share with you.
Here are some of the things that helped me, and that I believe can help any founder navigate the mental health challenges of the startup journey:
Acknowledge the struggle. The first and most important step is to admit that you’re not okay. There’s no shame in struggling. It’s a sign that you’re human. Don’t try to bottle it up or pretend that everything is fine. Talk to someone you trust – a co-founder, a friend, a therapist.
Build a support system. You can’t do this alone. Surround yourself with people who support you, who believe in you, and who you can be vulnerable with. This could be your co-founders, your family, your friends, or a community of other founders. I’m a part of several founder groups, and they have been a lifeline for me.
Prioritize your physical health. Your mental and physical health are inextricably linked. When you’re feeling down, it’s easy to neglect your body. But that’s the worst thing you can do. Make sure you’re eating healthy, exercising regularly, and getting enough sleep. It’s not a luxury; it’s a necessity.
Find an outlet outside of work. Your company is not your entire life. You need to have other interests, other passions, other things that bring you joy. For me, it’s spending time in nature, practicing Taoism, and reading Rumi. These things help me to disconnect from the stress of work and reconnect with myself.
Don’t be afraid to seek professional help. There’s a stigma around therapy in our society, especially for men. But it’s one of the best investments you can make in yourself. A good therapist can give you the tools and strategies you need to cope with the challenges you’re facing.
The Resilience of the Entrepreneurial Spirit
Being a founder is one of the hardest things you’ll ever do. But it’s also one of the most rewarding. There’s nothing quite like the feeling of building something from scratch, of bringing a vision to life, of creating something that has a positive impact on the world.
The entrepreneurial spirit is a resilient one. We are a tribe of dreamers and doers, of optimists and innovators. We are the ones who see the world not as it is, but as it could be.
But we are also human. We have our limits. We need to take care of ourselves, and each other. We need to create a culture in the startup world where it’s okay to not be okay, where it’s okay to ask for help.
So, if you’re a founder who’s struggling right now, please know that you’re not alone. There’s a whole community of us out here who have been through it, who get it, and who are here to support you. Don’t be afraid to reach out. Your mental health is just as important as your company’s valuation.
Let’s build a future where founders can thrive, not just survive. Let’s build a future where we can be both successful and whole.
Frequently Asked Questions
How can I apply this thinking to my own situation?
Start by identifying the core principle behind the opinion, not the specific example. Then ask yourself: does this principle apply to my context? If yes, test it in a small, low-risk way before going all in.
What's the most common pushback you get on this?
People often push back by citing exceptions or edge cases. And they're usually right that exceptions exist. But building a strategy around exceptions rather than patterns is a losing game for most founders.
How has this view evolved over time?
My thinking on most topics has changed significantly over the years. Early in my career, I held many conventional views that experience proved wrong. I try to update my beliefs when the evidence changes.
Do all experts agree with this view?
No, and that's fine. The best ideas in business are often contrarian. I share my perspective based on my experience and data, but I encourage you to seek out opposing viewpoints and form your own conclusions.